in perspective

today I went to visit a children's care centre, run by the metropolitan police department of ulaanbaatar, mongolia. this is the only place in UB that finds and retrieves children from the streets. 'street children' is term that did not exist, at least that's what the lieutenent colonel told us, until 1990s when a transition in mongolia brought with it many consequences for society. it is claimed that there are very few street children in mongolia because most of them have been housed or reunited with their famillies. at the centre today there were 41 children from the ages of 3 to 17, one kid having counted his 138th day and the 3 year old girl that was picked up last night at 4am sitting outside a shop by a police officer. we shared the same name. many of these children have homes and parents but prefer to live on the streets, and some are just lost. some due to hostile homes and some has stayed out for so long that they prefer to live with other children that they choose to call their family. friendships are formed, famillies are made, more children are born. The situation has undergone a metamorphisis within the society where children on the streets cannot be counted and packed off to clean dorms until their parents come. a whole new social environment, needs and expectations and living standards have been created in the last few years that what we originally called street children no longer live on the streets, but in day centres and drop in centres that feed and wash them but can never help them solve their problems. maybe some don't think they have problems to solve because their way if living hasn't been much different as far as they remember.
on days like these i start to feel myself, sense my environment and exercise my emotions. previously, despite working in a charity organisation and working with other people with similar goals and aims, the essence of wanting to be here, in mongolia, tackling little problem at a time had diminished. i too was sucked into the state of labourer and forgot the bigger picture. i was so concerned with small details that i completely forgot my personal reason to wanting to be here. and that is to make change or at least help in the process of making change. and if that's not possible, then i should at least continue to try until it's not longer physically possible. i realised today that i had been sleeping and i need to use my head, listen to my surroundings and get that spark back.
money, freedom, material goods and the usual have been occupying my head lately and this was the best wake up call. no more sloth. it's just a shame that the 41 children from today cannot wake up from their state of sleep like i have, and find themselves at home, safe.