Student again

As I mentioned in a previous blog I have moved country again, or shall I say we have moved country again’ (it’ll never be I for a long time I’m afraid), to study for a masters degree. Although the decision never felt hard to make, only very natural and obvious, the effects borne from it are not so easy to deal with. To begin with, I am a student once more, mixing and mingling with other students, teachers, professors and professional slackers, all with some purpose in their lives. I’ve been looking forward to this all summer, greatly anticipating the process and prepping myself as much as I can to not trip over again, like the last time I was at an educational institution.

And so far everything I’ve read is genuinely interesting for me and I’ve enjoyed reading text after text on what other people may think is the most boring topic ever. I’ve truly looked forward to my lectures, raised my hand and participated in every class, couldn’t wait to get to the library to find the reference books and actually read them on my train back home. To a sceptic, this may seem like a typical first few weeks back at school type of behaviour, but I can feel that this time round it’s very different. Why? There’s just too much at stake. We all know how important education is, how it will give us the financial and social independence that we should all strive for towards the end of adolescence (although the reality of this possibility is becoming harder especially in the UK, with higher education fees becoming stupidly high with not much prospect for returns i.e. employment, at least in the European markets).  I had known this from a long time ago, and realised the importance of a degree and an educational experience, in my personal case at least, however it seems now that it was never taken seriously, by me.

In 2006 I was a somewhat mature kid with some ideas of what I want to be but actually no real idea of anything else. I spent three years studying but not actually studying a subject that half interested me because I didn’t understand it too well, making friends with people who weren’t really friends (although I have met a few special people), wasting hours and days away following the crowd, all in fear of not being with any crowd of people, of being alone.

Living in the real world for a few years and returning to education is very surreal. The professors and lecturers don’t seem that intimidating, the admissions officer not so professional, (most of) my fellow students not so cool or collected, the prospect of reading not so daunting, assignments not so scary, and the campus all very lovely. I’m lucky in that the Birmingham University’s Edgbaston campus looks like a proper campus, as seen in American teen movies, all large leafy green trees, looming clock tower, ancient buildings and (probably) hundreds of nooks and crannies to let the day slip by with a large text book.

And above all, I fully realise that I’m here for a reason, with purpose, and there’s no time to be standing around clueless. I have a child, a husband and a marriage, many great friends, professional experience to a degree, and most importantly, a future to think about, quite seriously. It’s not daunting at all, if anything, it makes learning, socialising, and living more interesting. I just wish that what I see now, and what I understand at this point in time was available to me the first time round. None of us are getting any younger, and with super achieving bright young things with a book deal, an online business and a first degree whilst looking like supermodels, ‘age is a high price to pay for maturity’ (Tom Stoppard).

For those people who are not patient enough to study for a long time and go from a bachelor’s degree to a master’s (like me) or has already been ‘enlightened’ to some sense, I highly recommend taking gaps between the process of seeking knowledge. Not only do you get to laugh at yourself from times before, you know yourself better.

This is my new university! (Aston Webb building).